My Girl
by willog
Summary: This is my first fic and is w/t based. It is my personal idea of what could have happened after 'the gift' and is assuming that season 6 never took place - please read... :P
1. When the world's in a Paper Cup

title my girl  
author willog  
rating PG-13 (for swearing, violence, spike, bad spelling and lesbian lovin' [grrrr!])  
theme BtVS (do not read , if you are in anyway disturbed by the love between two women, you are seriously misguided and probably shouldn't read this on account of it upsetting you - poor love, if not read on and enjoy)   
notes continuing on from 'the gift' and ignoring all of season six.  
disclaimer joss owns the scooby gang and sunnydale and the wonderful Willow and Tara (damn!)   
distribution If you are crazy enough to want this you can have it. write and give me the addy though so I can show off to peeps.

**Reviews please please please please please let me know what you think - Reviews will make me smile, I smile and I'm happy and the world can continue in peace without having to witness the wrath of my bad mood - thankin ya nicely **

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**19th June 2001**

It had been three weeks since the funeral, and although the scooby gang had managed to fit back into some kind of routine after the death of their friend, none of them could really believe that it was happening. Willow especially was finding it incredibly difficult to grasp the fact that her best friend in the whole wide world was gone for good, and had found herself twice letting herself into the Summer's house on lonely evenings when Tara was working, only to find bare rooms and the cold, dark feeling that empty houses had. A 'For Sale' sign had been put up by realtors in starch suits the previous week, and the thought of strangers living in 1630 Revello Drive had made them all feel sick, especially Dawn.   
Poor Dawnie. After Glory was killed everything went back to the way it had been, with the exception of Giles, Spike, Willow, Tara, Anya, Xander and Dawn. Only they remembered what had happened, as with so many near misses of the apocalypse, people found ways to forget. They even forgot Dawn, and the memories that had been created in people's minds, including the mind of Hank Summers were gone, and when he came to Buffy's funeral, he came to mourn the death of his only daughter. This meant that Dawn was now in the charge of Giles, who had taken her in without question , because, in a way, he had lost his daughter as well. 

And so, that Tuesday afternoon, the gang began to drift into the familiar setting of Giles' living room. Xander, Anya and Tara took the couch, Giles was on an armchair, and Willow and Dawn leant against each other, perched on the kitchen cabinet. 

"I've called you here tonight for a reason." Giles began the meeting, removing his glasses as he spoke to wipe them on the cloth that he kept in his shirt pocket.  
"Let me guess - the world is going to end." Xander said, his humour drier than it had once been.  
"Not exactly. Dawn and I have decided to move house, and we'd like to ask for your help and whether Willow and Tara would like to live with us, you know to help look after Dawn when I'm at the shop, and I'll be taking a few business trips to England in the next couple of months. It's entirely up to you. You wouldn't be expected to pay rent." Giles looked nervously at the two faces as they exchanged glances across the room. "Of course if you want to talk first abou.." he was cut off by Willow and Tara who spoke simultaneously.  
"Well I'd like to, if you'd like to." They both smiled gently and Willow turned to Giles, "We'd love to."  
"Thankyou so much for asking us." Tara added quietly.  
"There is a fourth room" Giles spoke to Anya and Xander, "but we thought that with the wedding and all, that you'd prefer a place of your own."  
"Right. We're fine where we are. Thanks anyway." Xander said, and subconsciously took his fiancés hand in his own, getting a reasurring squeeze from the unusually quiet ex-demon.   
"That's settled then. I have some people interested in this place and they want a quick move, so we can be in the new house by the end of the month, you girls can join us whenever you can get out of your apartment."  
"Wait a sec. Where are we moving _to_?" Willow asked, frowning.  
Giles said nothing, but looked at Dawn instead, as if asking her permission.  
"We going to buy my house." Dawn said. "Mr Giles is going to be my Uncle and I'm going back to school. We had a long talk about it, and it's what I want to do."  
Willow put her arms around the small figure beside her and Dawn held her back tightly, taking deep breaths so that tears did not come, while everyone in the room fell silent. "Thank you." Willow whispered, drawing away, wiping the tears from her own cheeks. "Thank you." she said again, this time to Giles and she walked over to where he sat, bent over and hugged him tightly.

That night, unable to sleep, Willow and Tara began to sort through their belongings. It somehow helped to be keeping busy and to have a goal to work towards, and neither could think of a better goal than looking after Dawn, because she needed them, and being needed kept them going. **_  
_**"Are y_you sure that you're going to be alright w_with this? I mean th_there'll be a lot of memories there." Tara asked as she folded Willow's crazy birthday cake shirt and placed it on a pile of clothing to be boxed up.  
"Yeah." Willow said, nodding as if she were reassuring herself as well as Tara, "I mean, it'll be weird and all, but I just hate the thought of having strangers going into her room and using her furniture." she paused and put the vase that she was carrying on the floor beside her desk, before going and sitting on the end of the bed. "That's the other thing. I was wondering if we could maybe use the spare room, I mean Dawn will have her old room, and Giles will have Joyce's, but I don't think that I would feel comfortable sleeping in Buffy's..." she stopped herself, realising that she had said Buffy's name, which for some reason she had tried not to do. Silent tears rolled down her cheeks again, and Tara, noticing this moved to sit behind her on her bed, wrapping her arms around her waist and holding her tightly to her.   
"Shhh." she whispered, "I'm here."  
They sat like that for a while, just holding each other and crying, as they had done so many times over the last month. After a while, and realising that it was getting late, Willow sat up, and turned to face her girlfriend.  
"Are you sure that you don't mind doing this?" Willow said, looking straight into those beautiful blue, grey eyes.  
"Of course I don't," Tara wrapped a strand of Willows hair around her finger affectionately. "You know how I adore Dawnie, and Giles is so sweet. But I mean, this was our first home, you know together, if we move in with Giles and Dawn we won't have that. But you guys are my family, and I'm totally prepared to do this. Are you?"  
"Yes. As long as I've got you. You're kinda keeping me sane at the moment."

Meanwhile at Gile's house...  
_"Dawn listen to me." Dawn felt Buffy's hands on her shoulders, and her warm breath on her face in contrast to the cool night air, "Listen. I love you. I'll always love you. But this is the work I have to do." Suddenly she realised what was happening and began to cry, and threw her arms around her sister as if to stop her from going anywhere, "Tell Giles I... I figured it out. And I'm okay. Give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now -- you have to take care of each other." Buffy pulled herself out of her sister's grip and looked at her, their foreheads touching, and their hands held tightly together "You have to be strong. Dawn. The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live. For me." And then she was gone._  
Dawn sat up in bed suddenly, realising that it had only been a dream, but still her face was damp with tears, and her breathing was rasp and heavy. It had seemed so real, because it had been real, so real and the words echoed in her head even when she was awake, urging her to carry on despite the dark and raw pain that she felt in her stomach and heart continually.   
She had no one now, Mr Giles was kind to her, but she knew that in so many ways, she was just a replacement to fill the gap that Buffy had left in his life, and until they were in the new house, she could not go to Willow or Tara. Suddenly feeling thirsty, she climbed out of bed and made her way downstairs to get some milk, counting the steps as she descended, an old trick her mom had taught her to calm her down. By the time she had got to the bottom of the staircase her breathing was normal again and she tiptoed into the kitchen and opened the fridge, only to find a pale fanged face staring back at her in the light given off by the refrigerator, and before she could scream a cold hand was clamped around her mouth.

"Shh pet!" A familiar voice spoke as he removed his wiry fingers from around her face. "It's only me!  
"Spike!" Dawn said and fell into his arms, so relieved to see him.  
"Bloody hell, what d'you think were doin sneaking up on me like that. Scared me to death."  
Dawn smiled at the irony, "You're already dead spike!"   
"Minor detail. Anyhoo what are you doing here pet?" They moved to go and sit on the sofa and Dawn explained that she was living with Giles now,  
"Where the hell have you been Spike? After the funeral you just disappeared. We didn't know what had happened to you."   
"Didn't know you cared little one." Spike joked and put his arm around his little friend's shoulders. "I had to see a man about a dog, or somethin like that anyway."  
"But you're back now right?"  
"For a couple of weeks only I'm afraid, then I'll be leaving you in the capable hands of Rupert and the witches for a while."  
"It's just. Oh, I don't know. You know I love Willow and Tara, and Giles and everyone, but you kinda looked after me, and I know everyone said that it was only to get close to Buffy, but then.. you know."  
Spike laughed gently, "Ah, can't keep anything from you pet can I, you know I'm just a bloody puppy with this chip in my head, no matter what anyone else says, I'll end up like Peaches if I'm not careful. And you Summers girls are the only one's who've ever shown me any kindness, so I'm gonna do my best to help you out now." They sat in silence for a minute and Dawn rested her head on the vampire's shoulder,   
"You really loved her didn't you?"  
"Yep. But we gotta keep going en't we." there was silence for a while, 

_"We're not all gonna make it." Buffy said, "You know that.__  
__Spike returned, a couple of axes in his hand. "Yeah. Hey, I always knew I'd go down fighting. Sure as hell never thought it'd be on this side..." then he added shyly "...or for this reason.."__  
__"I'm counting on you, Spike." Buffy turned to him, a serious look on her face, "To help protect her."__  
__"'Til the end of the world." he replied, understanding, "even if that happens to be tonight. Nobody touches the Little Bit while Spike's around. I promise."_

"I made a promise to the slayer that I'd protect you, and I fully intend on keeping it, which is why I came back here to make sure that this lot were looking after you right. I would feel so much better if I could keep my eye on you personally, but I have to make this trip and I honestly think that this is the safest place for you, crazy huh?"  
"When do you leave?" Dawn asked, looking up at him.  
"I'll wait until you guys have moved and then I'll have to go."  
"Where are you going?"  
"Love to tell you little one, but I can't. If you need to contact me, I'll leave a number with Angel, so just call him and I'll get the message."

Suddenly the door opened and they both jumped up and prepared for an attack, Dawn running to switch the lights on, and Spike grabbing a crossbow from the coffee table, aiming it at the two silhouettes that had entered.  
"Well if it isn't dead boy junior." Xander announced as the light came on.  
"Bloody Hell, don't you people knock." Spike sighed, dropping the crossbow as the chip did it's job.  
"We have keys. That means that we don't need to knock." Anya said, taking off her jacket and flopping onto the armchair. "So there."  
"Right. But you don't live here. Why are you here?" Spike continued.  
"Patrol. Just come back from." Xander replied. "Could say the same thing about you?"  
"Gotta stay somewhere. I had some business to do - tell you bout it later. Came back and some wanker's moved into my crypt, so I've taken the liberty of moving back in with the watcher." Xander got up and moved towards the kitchen, "While you're there you can get my drink out of the microwave. I was warming it up when I got interrupted."  
Xander reached in and got Spike's mug, the 'Hug the Librarian' one and uttered a quiet "ewww" before making coffee for himself and Anya.   
"Does the G-man know about this little arrangement yet." Xander asked, as he walked back in to the lounge.  
"No. The G-man does not. What are you doing here Spike?" Rupert Giles stood at the bottom of the stairs, looking a little confused and as if he had just woken up, which he had.  
"Here to see you of course." Spike turned and looked pointedly at Dawn.  
"Yeah yeah. Going to bed now so that you can have you're 'adults-only' discussion. 'night" she got up and made her way upstairs, and Giles took her place on her couch.  
"Goodnight Dawn" Giles said and turned to Spike. "Start talking."

Part deux coming very soon…. (so review me already!!!!)


	2. And you want it to last

**25th June 2001**

"Do you ever wonder what would have happened if Glory had of won?"   
"I try not to, but yeah I do." Tara sighed slightly as she finished, and Willow reached forward to touch her cheek gently.   
"Sorry. I didn't mean to remind you about what happened." She stared at her lovers face for a few seconds, thinking "You so don't have to answer this if you don't want to, and just tell me where to stick it if you don't and I'll never bring it up again, but… What was it like? In that place I mean."   
"It's okay, honestly."   
"Are you sure." Will leant back on her pillow, "Oh, I shouldn't have brought it up. I'm sorry."   
Tara turned onto her side, leaning her chin on one hand, and bringing the other to drape across Willow's trunk, gently stroking the arm furthest from her. 

  
"I wanted to tell you before, and I'm sorry if I haven't. I didn't want to be going on about me when we had so much else to think about." She smiled reassuringly before continuing, "It… it was awful. I could see out of my eyes and hear and smell and feel everything, but I couldn't respond. I was screaming sometimes to be heard, but there were so many other, strange voices screaming inside my head with it that I couldn't tell which one I had spoken aloud. There were two voices though that I heard clearly, one was yours, and the other was a voice inside me, that never stopped asking 'willow, where's willow? Where is she?' It wasn't mine, because you were always there, that I'll always remember. There was a pain, the pain of being lonely and dirty and scared and alone, and nothing would numb that pain, but if I could feel you close it made it slightly easier to bear, and I thought, that even if I'm like this for the rest of my life, I could put up with that pain, because of you. I'd do that."   
"Oh Tara!" Willow took her into her arms and held her tightly. "I'm so sorry I couldn't get there in time. That dragon, that stupid dragon, I kept blaming it on the dragon, but it wasn't; it was my fault. I'm so sorry you had to go through that because of me."   
"But I'm not in that place anymore. Because of you. I was so lost, but you found me."   
They pulled back until their faces met in a deep kiss, a renewal and confirmation of the love that had been declared between them over the last year and a half, and finally came to rest, arms embracing the other, and their foreheads touching.   
"I told you; I'll always find you." 

By ten that morning the pair were up and dressed and eating a late breakfast in the magic box with Dawn and Giles. Giles was eating a large muffin and looking over some account books for the shop, willow was nose deep in a book, and Dawn and Tara were pouring over a glossy magazine. Suddenly Giles looked up and smiled, laughing slightly through his nose.  
"What?" Willow asked, intrigued.   
"Nothing. It's just so quiet. It's hardly ever this quiet. It's nice." Giles, said, relaxing back into his chair.   
"Doesn't quiet usually mean that something bad's gonna happen?" Tara asked quietly.   
"Ooo. She's right, especially if somebody happens to point out that it's quiet." Dawn added, and they all suddenly glared at Giles.   
"Oh for goodness sakes girls. You can be so superstitious."   
"Yeah I suppose that being wary of the supernatural is a bit ridiculous, especially when you're living on the _hell mouth!" Dawn grinned at the unfortunate irony.   
"Really Dawn; you sounded just like…" he went quiet for a minute and removed his glasses awkwardly, "you sounded just like Buffy then."   
"Sense of humour must run in the family then mustn't it?" Dawn said, and smiled weakly at Giles.   
"Indeed." Giles said simply, and stood up to put the accounts back in it's place behind the counter, but as he turned back, the back door suddenly opened and three archers walked calmly into the store, aiming crossbows at Giles and the girls._

"Stay exactly where you are." The tallest of the three growled. He was the only male of the little ensemble and appeared to be in charge. A scar tore across his face, leaving him with a harsh look, and a deep squint in his left eye, and the wound appeared to be recent. The two females stood on either side of him, looking equally serious, and all three appeared to belong to some kind of army like uniformity.   
"What exactly do you think you are doing?" Giles asked, trying desperately to keep a cool head.   
"We're looking for the slayer."   
"Well I'm afraid you won't find her here. The slayer is in jail for murder and won't be leaving for a very long time thank god." Willow said, glaring at the trio. "Now if You don't leave and go back to where you came from you will have to deal with me." She levitated a vase from it's stand near the centre of the room and sent it hurtling to the wall above the intruders where it smash dramatically, spraying fragments over them.   
Just at that moment the entrance bell rang and everyone turned to see Anya and Xander standing in the doorway.   
"What the hell…" Xander began, but was quickly cut off by the twang and whooshing of a fast speeding arrow, released from the scared man's crossbow, that was heading straight for Xander, but was suddenly stopped short. Xander winced, awaiting the pain that would follow the arrows impact, but as the seconds ticked on and the pain failed to arrive, Xander sneaked open his eyes and looked, as did everyone else, in amazement to Dawn, who was standing, shocked and holding the arrow in question in her raised right fist.

  
  


tbc - part three coming very soon… REVIEW ME!!!!!!!!! please


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